Confessions of a Founding Father: A Poem

Listen up:

I’m only going to say this once.

Pay attention.

I never chopped down the fucking cherry tree.
I'm not some prim and proper elder statesman, 
oozing wisdom from every orifice.

People who tell you that are liars.

Guess what.

I can tell those.
That's how I got this job.
But I don't want it anymore.
I like booze and women
and I hate Ben Franklin. Pompous ass.
I don't want to spend my entire life in some dusty hall
arguing with a bunch of stuffy idiots.
I don't want to lead.
I want to live.